TWO dozen pairs of eyes bored into my back: the Scripture Union wasn’t happy. They had invited a devout Christian to the school to speak about his faith. He also happened to be a professional footballer, and a fatuous query about his day job had, embarrassingly, shifted attention away from an earnest bible discussion.
I had never been to church in my life, but the Scripture Union knew I was a Pittodrie regular. They invited me along, perhaps hoping to secure another member by dangling in front of me the prospect of an audience with Brian Irvine.
This was a lunchtime at Oldmachar Academy, Bridge of Don, circa 1988. Irvine had been speaking for a few minutes in the drama studio when questions were invited from the floor. Cue a couple of measured questions about the New Testament.
Then Irvine nodded to me, and I asked my question. I drew inspiration not from the scriptures, but from the wonderfully inane footballers’ Q&A that was trotted out in Shoot! each week
“What would you do if you found a million pounds?” I quizzed.
Irvine looked back, a little perplexed by my trifling fanboy query in the midst of a rather more weighty debate. To his credit, he made a polite attempt to form an answer about some act of charity or other. Meanwhile, I sank in my seat as tuts and glares tumbled in my direction from everyone else in the room.
Brian Irvine’s decency that day sums up the man. He has always been upfront about his religion, but with the modesty, integrity and quiet commitment - compare the crazed warblings of Glenn Hoddle - that also summed him up as a player.
He was not particularly gifted, and on a bad day was outright clumsy. A centre-half by nature, the consistency of Alex McLeish and Willie Miller in his early days with Aberdeen in the mid-eighties meant his sporadic first-team appearances tended to be uncomfortable stints at right-back; many’s the time he was on the end of a bollocking from his more celebrated defensive counterparts.
But as age caught up with McLeish and Miller, Irvine seized his chance at centre-half. He played nine times for Scotland and became feared for his power in air both in defence and attack; in one prolific spell he scored six goals in nine matches.
It was in 1995 when Irvine came into his own. Aberdeen seemed doomed to relegation, until he returned from injury to almost single-handedly drag them to safety. A modest and unshowy man by nature, he was not a player given to badge-kissing platitudes. That’s why his wild, vein-popping joy after a crucial goal against Celtic is one of my finest footballing memories.
Years later, as Irvine approached his late thirties, Aberdeen made an approach to take him back to Pittodrie. Irvine admitted that returning to the club would be a dream come true, but he turned down the chance of a Premier League swansong; he’d already said he would sign for First Division Ross County, and he was a man of his word.
Brian Irvine lost his job as Elgin City manager this week, despite almost taking them to the Third Division play-offs on a minuscule budget last year. It seems a rushed and foolhardy decision by those in charge at Borough Briggs - they’ll struggle to find another man of his stature.